I never tried to wish on being married because when I was younger I was taught to marry someone that can take care of me… I wanted to be the one to take care of my husband! But unfortunately, you’re girl don’t really know how to pick them! I thought that an underdog was where it’s at! I thought that if I loved him in such a way that was so healthy, I would be able to make him change and become a champion!!! Too bad that’s not the case with most!
When I had someone at the end of last year sell me the idea that I would be married to him and that my life would drastically change… I bought it! I thought; wow! Finally I’ll be married to someone I can trust and appreciate! I was willing to change my whole lifestyle so accommodate his! I was willing to go above and beyond! But within a month I started seeing that in fact, that’s all it was; a MF dream! Wow! I’m too old to be going through this!!! So, I decided I was going to go hard on the paint! Fuck it and fuck him for selling me a dream that was full of air! And I forgive myself for falling for it!
Bottom line, I think I’m more mad at myself for thinking there would still be a happy ending for me!!!
That’s what wishful thinking gets you! A fucking lesson in life!!!
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